To 10 Uncanniest Valley moments

They can do dragons, they can do apes, but them CGI animators sure can't do people:

1) Clu, Tron Legacy
2) Grand Moff Tarkin & Princess Leia, Rogue One
3) Alita, Battle Angel Alita (Not released yet but the trailer's already given me nightmares.)
3) The Dark Seekers, I Am Legend
4) Xavier and Magneto flashback, X-Men The Last Stand
5) Dain, The Hobbit 3
6) Steppenwolf, Justice League
7) Superman, Justice League

8) The Scorpion King, The Mummy Returns

9) Renesmee, Twilight
10) Cher, Burlesque

Pitch for the next Transformers film

Remake of Titanic, but the boat is an Autobot and the iceberg is a Decepticon.

(Note - I had no idea at the time of writing that the transforming Titanic-robot was actually a thing.)

The neutering of the raptors in the Jurassic series

Films 1 & 2: Killing machines
Film 3: Concerned parents
Film 4: Dogs

How to make a Terminator film

You will need the following ingredients:

1. Guns'n'Roses
2. "I'll be back."
3. "Hasta la vista Baby."
4. "Come with me if you want to live."
5. Skynet
6. The Resistance
7. Sarah Connor
8. John Connor
9. Arnold Schwarzenneger with half his face missing
10. Gloopy liquid metal guy making bits of himself stick out of other people's bodies
11. Time travel

Throw these together in no particular order and bang, you're done!

Blade Runner 2049

Android passes the Turing test by getting knocked up and abandoned by her boyfriend.

The casting of Jessie Eisenberg as Lex Luthor

"Who shall I cast as Lex Luthor in Batman vs Superman vs Doomsday vs Wonder Woman + Justice League Part 0?" Zack Snyder asked himself, chewing his gum thoughtfully.
He sat and pondered this for a while.
"I know!" he cried. "What did Christopher Nolan do when he cast the Joker for the Dark Knight? He got the most leftfield, against-type actor available, defied fan expectations and got him to give a performance that was twitchy and psychotic and loaded with mannerisms. And that worked out really well! I'll do that!"

Why haven't there been more H. P. Lovecraft adaptations?

I want a film about cosmic vomit monsters and I want it now!